Surviving the Holidays While Grieving

Helpful Hints For Surviving The Holidays While Grieving By Sandra Brown Neahusan

After the loss of a loved one people experience birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays without them. These can be very rough times for those in grief recovery. Memories flood at every level. In her book, “How Could I Wish You Back From Heaven?” Sandra Brown Neahusan offers these helpful suggestions to help:

1. Allow yourself to miss your loved one. Sadness and tears are natural expressions of grief.
2. Talk about the person who has died. Cherish and share your memories with your families and friends. They probably have great stories to share with you.
3. Do not feel pressure to participate in all the holiday parties and family dinners. Write a letter to your family and friends explaining that you love them but you need some time to yourself. Tell them you appreciate the invitation and if you feel well that day you may join them for a short time.
4. Take care of yourself. Do not miss meals. Make sure you get enough rest.
5. Start a new tradition. It is not disrespectful to your loved one’s memory to make a change.

To listen to a radio interview conducted with Sandra by Ann Corcoran of radiosrq.com, please follow this link: http://radiosrq.com/?s=neahusan.

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Passages of Time

I rarely think about passages of time on a daily basis.  Do you? 

Try this exercise:  Take five minutes and consider each decade of your life.  Don’t spend a lot of time thinking about it.  Just write what comes to mind. Can you quickly jot down two highlights of each period?

Memories

I have spent a lot of time this week going through old pictures. In my move to Florida I brought things I really don’t need. In preparation for a community garage sale next week I am going back through boxes for the third time.
Some of the pictures I have date over 100 years. Some are Ron’s family and some are mine.
Looking at the faces, some full of promise and hope and some reticent and sad.
I don’t know all the personal stories but the ones I do know have many different emotions connected with them.
I saw new moms and dads holding infants in their arms, glazed eyes, tired from the rigors of caring for infants, but still glowingly hopeful. I saw children with stars in their eyes looking at all the presents they received on Christmas morning.
I know some of those children have lived up to their parent’s hopes. I know some have taken paths that brought great destruction on their families, and to themselves.
Yet the cycle of life continues and each new life brings new joy and hope.

Radio Interview Sandra Brown Neahusan

: http://radiosrq.com/news/how-could-I-wish-you-back-from-heaven/9577

Holidays Alone

Hello Everyone.

I trust you’ve all had a wonderful Easter Sunday celebrating our Savior’s death, burial and resurrection.  We had a lovely service at church this morning with beautiful music and great preaching from Pastor Feathers.

This is the second Easter since Ron passed away.  Holidays are always so hard.  There is always that “vacant chair.”   I have very generous neighbors who invited some of us who were alone today for a wonderful dinner.  I look forward to the leftovers in my refrigerator for tomorrow.  Thank you, dear friends, for including me.

How we spend our holidays without our loved ones changes from year to year.  If your family can’t be together, or you have no family, take a look around your church, neighborhood or workplace.  Are there others in the same situation you are in?  If you don’t feel comfortable enough to open your home, you can always meet at a restaurant.   What about checking with a nursing home in your area and seeing if you can come to help serve?

What I am trying to say is that time comes when you must cease obsessing about your loved ones being gone and start focusing on others.  It’s perfectly acceptable and necessary to grieve the loss of those we love.  As Zig Ziglar said, “Grief is the price we pay for loving someone.  If there was no love there would be no grief.”  No one can choose the length of our grief.  We will know when we’re ready to interact with others.  Let yourself grieve, then rejoin civilization.  If God had wanted our lives to end He would have taken us also.  We are to continue in His will for us.

I was blessed this week to have my son here for a few days.  We spent time on the beach, doing odd jobs around the house, eating at great restaurants, sitting by the pool and just enjoying conversation with each other.  Since he lives far away and also travels so much for work I am grateful for any time we can share.  Maybe his wife can come next time.

I will spend time with my daughter’s family in a couple of weeks and I always look forward to that.  It will be the first time I see my grandson play a baseball game.  Go team!

Blessings to you all.

 

 

How Could I Wish You Back From Heaven?

How Could I Wish You Back From Heaven?.

How Could I Wish You Back From Heaven?

I have never written a blog before but am willing to give it a try. I trust you will be patient with me as I attempt to share thoughts and insights I have gained since my husband suddenly passed away three years ago.
I give all the credit to God for His sustaining, comforting and encouraging me through these very difficult times.
I have experienced every emotion you might imagine while traveling the road of grief recovery. God has always been there for me.
He also brought a wonderful group of friends alongside to help me on this path.
I look forward to sharing and interacting with you.

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